Rules for Successful Single Living

      By Fern Horst

"Rejoice evermore. Pray without ceasing. In every thing give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you. Quench not the Spirit. Despise not prophesyings. Prove all things; hold fast that which is good. Abstain from all appearance of evil. And the very God of peace sanctify you wholly; and I pray God your whole spirit and soul and body be preserved blameless unto the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ. Faithful is he that calleth you, who also will do it." (I Thessalonians 5:16-24)

Most of us don't like rules; that is, not unless we aren't quite sure how to fulfill a certain role, or we become frustrated by the free-for-all chaos that rules usually help to resolve. At the end of his first letter to the Thessalonian church, Paul gave the above rules for living. They apply to every Christian, but right now lets take a look at them from an unmarried Christian's perspective, and how they help to keep us from floundering in an unproductive free-for-all in life.

"Rejoice evermore" and "in everything give thanks". Perhaps these two are the ones we neglect the most as singles, or attach too many qualifiers to our thanks. It's easy to list our blessings and then pray, "But Lord, if I'd just have a better roommate, someone I could talk to when I come home, or even better yet, the perfect spouse." Or we pray, "Lord, I'm grateful for the love of my nieces and nephews, but why didn't you ever give me my own children?" And, "Father, this sure is a neat apartment, but if you'd make sure I get a raise this year, I'd be able to buy my own house and have a yard, too". But these rules indicate that we need to be thankful without qualifiers, without "buts" or "whys" attached on the end of our praises. "In everything give thanks" -- not just when we understand, or when we have everything just the way we'd like it.

"Pray without ceasing." If there's an opportunity that singles have that married people don't have as freely, it's fulfilling this command. When we don't have the distractions of a spouse as we're getting ready in the morning and as we're lying in bed at night, we can spend that time praying continually. We're also more likely to not have someone in the car with us or perhaps even in our homes, and can spend more time than our married brothers and sisters praying out loud if we'd like, without anyone eavesdropping on our private conversations with the Lord.

"Quench not the Spirit." If the previous rule is the easiest for us as singles, perhaps this one is the hardest. I believe that the Lord wants to do a work through single people that we are often oblivious to. We find it so easy to be distracted by the possibilities of marriage that we completely miss the fact that God has special opportunities for us. We quench the Spirit when we insist on focusing on marriage, when God said that we are free from that focus for a greater purpose: serving Him without distraction.

"Despise not prophesyings." Prophesyings are the teachings and admonitions of God-appointed preachers and teachers. We often don't want to hear what they have to say, especially when they step on our toes. But God has ordained them for a reason, and we need to be open to hearing His Word through them. We do need to make sure that what we are taking to heart lines up with God's written Word, the Bible. When we do so, we are fulfilling the next command, which appropriately follows: "Prove all things; hold fast that which is good". We need to discern what we hear, discarding that which misses the mark of God's truth, and holding fast to that which is right and good.

"Abstain from all appearance of evil." When we live alone, this one is especially important. Often there is no one around to hold us accountable and we sometimes forget what some activities or possessions may look like to others. They may appear to others be something completely different than what they are, and we need to be alert to what others may assume about our lifestyles from the little glimpses they see of us.

The result of following these rules for living are found in the final verses: God will sanctify us fully and preserve us blameless at Jesus Christ's coming. That goal is certainly worth the effort to confine ourselves to these boundaries. Doubtless they will also make the journey here more peaceful and meaningful as well.

"Faithful is he that calleth you, who also will do it." Not only does God give us these rules, He provides the grace we need to follow them. What a comfort to know that we are not in this alone.

© 2001 Fern Horst

We appreciate your feedback sent to devotional@singleness.org (or use the "Contact Us" link at the top of this page).

*** WHEN YOU WRITE, please let us know if you would prefer to not have your comments chosen to be published in the next week's devotional.

IF YOU WOULD LIKE TO TO REPRINT this devotional on the internet, all that we require is that you reprint it in its entirety, include the author's name, the copyright information, and a link to www.singleness.org.

FOR HARD COPY REPRINTS of more than 50 copies, please write to contact us for permission.

Thanks!

Visit the Devotional Archives

We appreciate your feedback, which is an inspiration, encouragement, and blessing to us! Please use our Contact Us page to send us your response. Thanks!